Twitter is sort of a cesspool these days, but some might say that unbeaten tweets are a good use of the social media platform. I might say they are the best use of it.

There was that year I tweeted out all 353 losers. But many people did not appreciate the timeline graffiti (how did Banksy win the public over?) so in response to your feedback I now only tweet apologies to certain teams after their first loss. In order to be completely transparent, here are the unbeaten tweet rules approved by the board of directors for the 2020 season.

A team will get its first loss tweeted if it meets one of four conditions upon its first loss:

1. Be the first team to lose.

2. Be in the top 50 at the beginning of the day.

3. Be among the final 50 teams to lose.

4. A team not meeting the first three criteria will be put into a drawing at the conclusion of its first loss. I will put 10 strips of paper into a hat. On one strip I will write the team’s name and on the others I will write nonsense words like “looptid” and “Dakich”. If I draw the strip containing the team’s name, the team will get a tweet. If I draw one of the other strips, the loser will not get a tweet this season.

Keep in mind that I am but one person and until the last few unbeatens, the tweets are sent out by a robot after it receives an official box score from the game. This can sometimes take up to an hour after the conclusion of the game, or longer if the game is played in an unusual location like Anchorage or the Bahamas.

Thank you and enjoy the tweets.